and then it hit me

Stockholm, SWEDEN-- “i think i really gained weight on this trip,” i tell my tita as we get our coats after a fine dinner at grodan. suddenly the coat attendant cheerfully goes, “that’s good! it means you’re alive!”

5 days later, i tell myself the same thing on a road trip to ystad in southern sweden. the plan is to drive from stockholm to skäne to get my tita’s things from her old flat, visit a wine cellar, and possibly go to nearby copenhagen afterwards. one hour on the road and we’re all happy campers after getting some coffee and goodies from a gas station. fika on the go. tita’s funky playlist blares from her vel satis. we all comment on how much snow the day is getting. she then points to neat stacks of ice on the right, which look like big marshmallow pieces. unfortunately, she also swerves to a particularly slippery part of the road. her vel satis then slides to the right and then to the left. i realize something is not right when tita keeps saying, “no, please, no.” the car spins thrice on the icy highway and i think to myself in a strangely calm way, “is this it? there are still a lot of things i want to do.” i brace myself for impact as we hit the railing on our right. the car stops. i look around. it's a miracle there are no cars behind us. tita and l are okay. i’m okay. just a little bump and some spilled coffee (some might say renault makes ugly cars but the vel satis seems fine in the more important respects).

so yes, i have holiday pounds to shed (damn swedish smörgåsbord). i also had an unsettling car accident. but i’m writing this, and it means i’m alive. if the universe could flash one word at me in bold letters it would be perspective.

god jul/merry christmas all. let's do fika soon!